THE DAILY MONSTER PAPERS 119
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You can click on the drawing for a bigger view,
or click on the following links to download the Monster
as a wallpaper for your iPhone or iPad.
And if you have a theory about this Monster,
please post a comment below! I’m looking forward
to your thoughts!
Love this one!
Thank you, Don! :^)
Craig was enjoying a smooth cup of Java at his favorite coffee shop when the monster named Helda walked in. She was wearing a purple shirt, shorts, and hot pink stilettos. All Craig could do was stare, but then something happened his mouth dropped! And why? Because Grunt the town DJ walked in and kissed Helda right in front of everyone. Craig jumped up and yelled, “Oh,no, you didn’t!” The room became quiet. Craig strutted across the shop and dramatically dropped his quarter into the juke box and picked out a hip 80’s song. Grunt then said, “Lets do this!” Both Grunt and Craig soon became a fury of flailing arms, flapping legs, and jiving bodies because as every monster knows, If you want the girl you have to jive! As the dancing went on Craig knew what he would have to do, the quipaton. As he preformed this move everybody in the room disappeared except Helda. He walked to her and said, “Don’t ever wear the same shoes as me ever again!”
GOOOOOOAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!!!
As if being born with a short torso, three fingers, no thumbs and one eye wasn’t bad enough, Alfalfa’s parents named him after a tiny flavorless health food used as filler on hippie dippie sandwiches.
The real trouble started when Alfalfa responded to a free offer he received in the mail for laser hair treatment. Although Alfalfa liked the one lock he had been born with and that he hand carved into different shapes each day with supreme hair gel, he had always dreamed of a full lush head of beautiful hair. This laser hair treatment was touted as being “the BEST and most advanced hair growth treatment ever offered and if you act now you will receive a year’s supply of our top-of-the-line shampoo.” Alfalfa couldn’t resist and went for it.
A week after the treatment there was still no sign of new hair growth–at least not on his head. Soon, he began to experience an insatiable itching between his legs and within a two week period began growing long dark curly locks between his thighs. The vines of hair were growing at alarming speed and couldn’t even be contained within his pin-striped bell bottoms. No matter how hard and how often he tried to remove the hair away, it kept growing back and each time thicker and longer. And so at last he decided to embrace his fate and just let it grow.
Sometimes we get the things we ask for, just not exactly the way we envision them. The happy ending to this story is that Alfalfa was quickly recruited by Lady GaGa’s wigmaker and is now the sole supplier of natural hair for all of her custom-made hair pieces.
He is going to the John Travolta fanclub meeting. Strictly by invitation only. The bouncer will only let you in if you wear flares, have one eye and six fingers.
Everyone else: don’t bother making the trip. You will be rejected.
He should be dancing… yeah!