DAILY MONSTER 176
Good morning. How’s your week so far? Judging by all the cool stories it looks like you’re having fun with the monsters. I’m excited to see what’ll happen between now and the grand No.200 finale (which will actually fall into April overtime on May 2nd.) Right now, I invite you to take a look at the great stories for Monster 175:
Of course, Monster 176 is waiting for you, too:
Is Monster 176 the sequel to yesterday’s monster? Or are they completely independent of each other? Saltwater and sweet? H2O and outer space? If they are in the same realm, how do they relate in size? And what of this particular individual? Angry? Or just hungry? Full or flat? Fluke or flounder?
Flease flost your flory flere. I mean… Please:
I can’t wait to see what you think of it all.
For now, I hope the day is treating you well
and that you know that 344 LOVES YOU
Daddy Bigmouth, the producer of the nasciturus 157 is with his firstborn child on the way to his speech therapist.
Deep into the cosy feathertale sleeps the firstborn, with the melodius name Susie.
Daddy Bigmouth feels so angry about his enormous teeth, that he could bite them all. He blames it on the teeth, that he cannot say his childs name in the right way.
Fufie, Fufie…
That sounds very stupid.
“MOM!!” Timmy shouted from his room on a Tuesday morning before school.
His mother shouted back from the kitchen, “What??”
“C’mere!!”
She set her morning toast down and walked to Timmy’s room. He was standing there, beaming.
“What?” she said from the doorway.
He pointed to his aquarium. “Look!”
She walked up beside him and gasped at the nuclear-esque mutant floating above the fake castle, colorful rocks, and fake trees. “Oh my God. Is that your Sea Monkey?!”
Timmy’s teeth beamed almost as big as the monster’s. “Yeah!! Isn’t it COOL??”
The other fish called him Moby so he ate them. His father told him he was too big to be coloring his back fin pink and punking up the black fur along his back, that if he was going to act like a thug he should leave and find his own thug lake to live in. So Moby ate his father and mother. (He let his little sister go.) The IRS visited and told him his father’s estate owed $21,003 in back taxes. They demanded immediate payment. They never smiled. Moby ate them, then ate the IRS. He belched very loudly and his belch sounded like Death. Moby thought he must be Death, so he ate everything. (Except his little sister.)
Now you may think this is a very big monster, but in fact he is the size of a quarter. His ginormous teeth are used to grab onto other fish’s tails, and blend in as to not get eaten. Unfortunately, it has one flaw, its little pink tail. It’s very noticeable and glittery. Most of these living monsters live in aqauariums. To bad.
Remember Moby Dick, well this one here is a distant relative named Herman. He is not a giant white whale like his distant cousin was, but merely a small black whale with ginormous chompers. Whats with the chompers? It’s for grasping on to the anchors of ships and going for a ride. So if you see him in the ocean don’t be alarmed, he won’t eat you. He just wants to catch a ride.
Willy’s stomach hurt. For a big, bulky whale like him, it was something terrifying. His stomach was probably the biggest part of his body, right after his impressive mouth. Not that the pain was too strong, but it unnerved him. By the big fish in the deepness, why was it him?
He hadn’t moved since a couple of days. As he was hidden quite well, he didn’t need to. It was dark anyway and all across his back grew sea anemonas along with colourful corals. He just needed to hold his mouth open and wait until his food swam in.
Not that he would eat fish, mind you. He was too big to eat enough fish to keep him satisfied, so he did like all the whales did: he just waited until enough plankton had filled his stomach and then started digesting. It was an easy-going life. His small eyes recognized something swimming inside. It was another one of those seahorses! Willy rolled his eyes. There was this special time of the year when they always started to swim inside him and when they returned, they had mysteriously duplicated.
It was like it always was. Half an hour later, the seahorse swam outside with another little seahorse frolicking around him, tumbling around and making rolls in the water. A few minutes later, the seahorses…swam back into his mouth! If Willy had had hair, he would have pulled it now. After they had swum back in, he clasped his mouth shut and heavily got up. Time to swim on.
Poor Willy. Little did he know that his “stomach pain” was in fact the effect of a perfect coexistence. He had a special entrail – the seahorses’ “cave”, big enough for them to think that they were in the open sea, small enough for the whale not to hinder his other entrails from working. As a thank for this safety, the seahorses would eat all the parasites that had swum inside the whale’s body and keep him nice and healthy.
One day he would appreciate his seahorses inside of him. Willy was still young. The day would surely come.
the natural history textbooks call it ‘Bucher’s Piranha Whale’, but it’s a misnomer: it’s 18 inches long, and it’s completely harmless – unless you’re a limpet or barnacle. it uses those impressive teeth to eat limpets and barnacles straight off the rocks, shells and all. the eyes are positioned waaay up in its forehead to protect them from the sharp fragments of limpet shell, which inevitably start flying about when it eats.
due to the way barnacle-shell grit usually ends up stuck between the Piranha Whale’s teeth by the end of a meal, it has a symbiotic partnership with the much smaller species, Munche’s Pot-Bellied Seahorse (commonly known as Daily Monster 175). after dinner, the Piranha Whale will sit with its mouth open, and wait for a Pot-Bellied Seahorse to come along, and extract all the stuff from in between its teeth – if the seahorse finds any edible fragments in there, it eats them itself, which is a convenient, low-risk and low-effort way for it to get food. although both species have been recognised for some time, their symbiotic relationship was only recently discovered.
you can’t keep a Piranha Whale as a pet in a tiled pool, because it would eat all the tiles off the wall, and in the process, probably destroy all the waterproofing. This is particularly catastrophic if said pool is indoors. The damage to the surrounding carpets would be incalculably expensive.
– colclough
I’m too tired to think of any funny comment, but I love this fella here. Looks like another crossbreed to me. Something like spermwhale- otter- mix?
Roger was absolutely ecstatic that after his long journey, he had finally found the illusive egg he had been searching for his entire life. Roger began to giggle, as he does when he is extremely nervous. Somehow, he just knew that they were meant for each other. The egg, on the other hand, after noticing Roger’s unruly teeth, wasn’t nearly as pleased to make his acquaintance.
My teeth are wide, my teeth are deep,
I need them here beneath the sea!
In case a vicious ocean sheep
or horsie comes to visit me!
Bruce (176) got tired of telling his brother, Elmer (175) that he DID NOT take steriods. He just grew that way. Anyway, Elmer still couldn’t say who the mother of his baby was so he should just leave him alone!
Her name is Baloochas. She likes to play with Cowman. There is a mean queen. Sometimes the mean queen doesn’t let Baloochas play with Cowman. Gbhjkqawesdc- this means that she likes to play with everybody. Baloochas likes to do everything. Baloochas lives in a castle. The queen lives far away. The castle is under the sea. Baloochas loves to make fireworks. psss psss whisper whisper pssss. She like to eat so she has a big mouth. Baloochas’s mom loves to play with Baloochas and monkeys and pretend castle. Baloochas loves to wag her tail.
Everyone meet William, the deformed whale. Willy for short.
Now Willy works for a mean and horrible creature that doesn’t appreciate Willy for any of the boring, time consuming things that he is forced to do.
But today, unknown by his boss, Willy will have his revenge….
“Coffee sir?” He asks with a grin.
This flounder found her father under water, tangled helpless in a mound of fishing wire. Thinking not of herself, she dove in there to help, and swam off with him right there beside her.
Northern Firefin Whales are some of the most incredible creatures of the briny deep. Their massive lower jaw has a bite pressure of 360 lbs per square inch. With the largest brain mass compared to body size, these wondrous beasts possess an absolutely enormous cranial cavity. Much like the diminutive honeybee, the remainder of the Firefin’s body defies sea-faring capabilities.
All that said, these beautiful monsters have the most peculiar feature possessed by any deep sea denizen: they are only 1 inch in total length. Another fascinatingly peculiar present from Mother Nature.
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I’d like to add that I found it very interesting that there are so many stories portraying a monster of small stature given that it looks rather whale-like as well.
Hoip and his friends are known for their pranks and this time he fell victim. Tunk and Resph slipped a head engorging pill into Hoip’s drink this morning and about an hour later, well into his swim to work, his head swelled up to an amazing size. This is Hoip just after it happened and already he is planning revenge.